Monday, January 27, 2020

Seashells and Shaming

I grew up in California and went to the beach often enough from my childhood onward that walking and picking up shells was a common thing to do, and something that I've always enjoyed.  I have an old wine bottle (conveniently picked up on the beach as well) that is full of shells that have to be over 40 years old:
The picture frame is made with California beach shells, courtesy of Barbara.

I have little bowls and displays of shells in my office:
Confession:  The sand dollars were all gifts from friends - I cannot find a whole sand dollar, ever!
When I was in California earlier this month, Barbara and I managed to get a quick walk in on a small beach just north of Santa Cruz, and as we've done forever, we both immediately bent our heads down, automatically looking for interesting shells, bits of driftwood, and sea glass:
I left this one there because the seaweed was attached to it, but what a pretty thing to come upon!
Natural art, courtesy of the ocean.
This is what I came home with - not a bad haul for a 10 minute walk.

As we were picking up shells, Barbara asked me if I was going to post about them on the blog; she reminded me of getting "shell shamed" by someone (I'd actually forgotten but yeah, that sounds about right) once before when I wrote about picking up shells.  The thing is, I obviously don't have an issue with picking up sea shells (or pine cones, as you can see some from North Carolina in the top picture).  I like to bring a little bit of nature into my home, and to me, it's perfectly fine to do.  I know some people might say that if everyone picked up shells, there wouldn't be any more shells on the beach but let's face it, that isn't going to happen, so I do my thing and it makes me happy.

But it has me wondering - what is something you do, or have done, that you've been shamed for when you didn't think it was wrong?  I'm sure as a blogger I've shared things that have made some of my readers be aghast at what I've done but thankfully it's rare when someone has commented and shamed me. Feel free to share your shame in the comments - we can absolve each other of our purported wrongdoings!

15 comments:

  1. Im with you...bring nature into the house....and even better, that nature is memories of good times!

    When I was doing weight watchers the first time..eons ago..and actually losing weight, I was eating a fair amount of peanut bitter each week. I was totally shamed for indulging in that because it was so many points/calories. They didn’t care that I wasn’t eating meat at the time and the peanut butter was probably better (in some ways) then their fatty cheeseburger!

    Ohh and one time I said that when I reach goal weight I want to be exercising a lot to allow me to eat like my brother a serious bicyclist...because he can eat ANYTHING...course he bikes 1000 miles a month..up mountains. I was shamed for that because it’s an ‘unhealthy’ goal.

    Having a blog/YouTube channel has caused me to grow a thicker skin!

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    1. Oh I forgot about the food police - yes, I have had some of that as well especially in the early years of blogging. Some of it was right but I didn't like hearing it at the time, LOL. I'll eat real (not powdered) peanut butter when I have a craving - it's delicious!

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  2. I love your shell collection! :) I used to pick up shells every summer when we'd go to Myrtle Beach as a kid and we'd keep them in a sand bucket in our garage (which makes me think that's where they still are). I'm wishing I had actually done something with mine. I do remember finding whole sand dollars there a few times, so maybe you'd have better luck along the Atlantic?

    Back when I was first starting my cooking blog someone posted a nasty comment because I shared a recipe that included a can of soup, basically saying that using shortcuts like that wasn't really cooking. I'm sure I've gotten other weird comments over the years, but that's the only one that actually bothered me.

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    1. Hmmm, I didn't think about the difference in oceans/shell availability. Well heck, now I need to test out your theory! :)

      Soup - OMG, I remember reading blog recipes where you first had to make your own chicken stock before you could make the meal and I thought "I'll never get the meal made at this point" so I decided using store-bought prep items were perfectly fine.

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  3. In the last month I've been admonished because I asked for a straw at a restaurant, been told I need to stop eating sugar, and told if I'm not going to an organic hairstylist, colorist, I'm harming the world. I'm sure there's more but I think as I get older, I tend to let that crap go in one ear and out the other!

    I think the whole shaming thing has gone way too far, in general. It seems as if for any and everything you do, there is someone who disagrees with it. And there's an anonymity about the internet that makes people think they can say whatever they want. They're the ones who should be ashamed!

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    1. Oh, straws are getting to be BAD but I love them and am not one to carry my own, so yeah...I'm the person asking for a straw as well.

      Wait a minute...ORGANIC hair color?? Right. I mean, probably henna, but that's not my shade so chemicals it is for me, LOL. Agree with you on the anonymity of shaming (thank god you spelled that word first so I could copy it, HA) - it definitely ratchets up the meanness factor.

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  4. I have a glass bucket of shells in my bathroom, but I'm afraid they are all store-bought! I'm sure I've been shamed, but I can't think of anything right now. I always ask for straws in restaurants and I haven't been shamed for it yet.

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    1. Are the straws you get in restaurants paper? I noticed that when I was in Santa Cruz, but then I figured it might just be that area's norm, not the entire state.

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    2. Ha! One time I stopped at a MacDonald's in Pacific Grove, and got a PAPER straw! But no, I haven't gotten paper anywhere else.

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  5. Shell shamed! Oh internets. Gah. I love the way your shells look. Have you found a good way to clean them? We brought some back from Aruba and they still... smell like Aruba.

    Someone shamed me for a video I posted about driving on the Salt Flats. Not that I was doing it, but that our rental car was lame. OOooo! And a long time ago, I wrote a post about people selling out and doing ANY sponsored content on their blogs and someone shamed me for having an ad on my blog for my husband's company. They didn't get the point (that I believe you shouldn't just say yes to anything that is FREE.)

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    1. I don't clean my shells but then they aren't from Aruba...maybe the ocean there smells stronger? I suppose putting them in a bucket of water with either some peroxide or bleach might kill whatever is making them smelly?

      Oh no, you had a lame rental car! Sheesh seriously?? People. As for the ANY sponsored content, I am right with you, which is why you don't see a bunch of random stuff here - I still get offered all kinds of crazy diet-y things even with not being much of a diet blog anymore.

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  6. The one thing that comes to mind is that I casually mentioned on my blog that I put in a spoonful of sugar in my coffee and someone commented "you put in a TABLESPOON of sugar????" I clarified that the actual amount was closer to a teaspoon, but later I thought who cares if I want to put a TB of sugar in my coffee???? It's MY coffee!! :)

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  7. I won't post any of my shells--my collection is substantial! Shelling is one of my favorite hobbies. I am picky, tho, and I don't pick up everything in sight. My favorite is finding intact sand dollars on the beach. It's really amazing to think that those fragile things make it to the shore unbroken.

    I've written about being shamed for healthy eating at neighborhood gatherings. Their issue, not mine, right? But it's not nice to comment on other people's plates.

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    1. Jealous that you can find the unbroken sand dollars - I really need to double down and try to find one.

      Food police are the worst; I don't think it's just casual conversation, it's judgement, and who cares?? Eat what you want and leave other people alone. Unless it's your children...then it's OK to be the food police, LOL.

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