It's been just over a year since my L3-L4 disc decided to blow up so it's time for a final update on my saga.
After trying pain management with medication and epidural steroid injections as well as physical therapy for over five months, nothing improved enough to make it through the day without extreme pain. I was finally ready to consult with a neurosurgeon about this. My neurosurgeon came highly recommended by a number of people I trusted, so when he said he could fix this and make me feel better, I decided to try a surgical intervention.
Seven months ago I had a
laminectomy and discectomy to relieve pressure on my nerve. While the
surgery went well, it took much longer than my neurosurgeon predicted
for me to feel 100% again, which made me question my decision to have
surgery in the first place. You hear so many tales of back surgery
gone wrong, and the longer it took for me to feel better, the more
nervous I became. Had my surgeon said something along the lines of
"your nerve has been compressed for so long that it will take quite a
while for it to settle down" I would have accepted the continued leg
pain as part of the recovery instead of worrying that the surgery didn't
solve anything.
That said, surgery was the key to healing my herniated disc. I can say that now. I can't even remember when my leg pain finally went away thanks to my other medical event, which was a grand mal seizure two months after surgery. As I was dealing with a new set of issues, the leg pain went on the back burner. I suspect it was somewhere around January that it finally resolved.
As for my back, my physical therapist told me that after having surgery - any surgery on any part of the body - it's changed forever. So I need to be aware of that and not do anything that might bring on another disc problem. I will not do any kind of jumping/high impact exercise ever again. And that's OK - better to lose the jump rope than to go through that painful hell.
I've been gently easing back into exercise. I walked for about four weeks before adding in a little bit of running. I like running and want to do it. My hopes are to build up to running three miles. However, if I start to have pain, I will stop. It's not worth getting hurt again. I don't see myself ever running long distances - I think my days of doing a half marathon, or probably even a 10K are done. But if I can run a few miles and feel good, I'll be content with that.
There is a happy ending to my herniated disc. It took a lot of trying different things to get to this point. It was the most painful thing I've ever gone through; pain that was 24/7, pain that hurt so badly that I was ready to hurl myself out of the car at one point. It's not something I would wish on anyone. But if you've discovered my blog while searching for someone who has gone through this and come out OK on the other side, I want to give you some hope that it can get better. Hang in there.
Showing posts with label nerve pain in leg. Show all posts
Showing posts with label nerve pain in leg. Show all posts
Monday, May 4, 2020
Friday, October 11, 2019
Herniated Disc Update #7 - Post Surgery
According to my surgeon, the recovery time for a laminectomy and discectomy is six weeks. Considering I'd been dealing with a herniated disc for six months, six weeks didn't sound all that bad. Besides, both the PA and my doctor said that after the first two weeks, I could go back to my normal life (whatever that is) with just a few caveats until the six weeks were up. You'll want to stay tuned for this...
But let's back up to surgery day. After I got home I parked myself on the couch, had a light dinner, visited with Diane who'd brought me some flowers, and finally felt enough pain in my back to warrant some Tramadol. Of course I was really wary of taking anything thanks to how barfy I got from most everything I tried in the months leading up to this, but along with the pain meds I was also sent home with a prescription for an anti-nausea medication; I took both and fell asleep.
On Tuesday I woke up feeling crummy but not barfy, so I continued with the pain meds. Really it wasn't that bad but considering I'd spent enough time at 10 on the pain scale in the early months of the herniation, I decided to not go there if I could help it. The pain was mostly located in my back but I still had a little bit in my leg from the nerve. The other oddball thing was that I'd be perfectly still, standing or lying down, and I'd get the biggest ZAP of pain - it'd take my breath away for a moment. This was the nerve reacting to surgery, yay. When that happened for the first time I was glad I hadn't started tapering off Gabapentin just yet. I needed as much help as I could get for that nerve. It wasn't something that warranted taking Tramadol because it was too unpredictable - the zaps would just happen whenever they felt like happening.
Wednesday was my worst day with pain from the surgery - the incision area hurt plus my back ached pretty bad. That was the day I could also remove the dressing covering the incision, and even though it was covered with steri strips, I could see some deep red bruises forming. But hey, I got to take a shower, so that was great. Although it was also a challenge since the post-op instructions said to not let the shower spray hit the incision. I was paranoid that I'd accidentally turn with my back to the spray out of habit...let's face it, at 56 I've been showering for a lot of years without any thought going into which way I should be facing. I made it through that OK, feeling both better as well as beat afterward. I took the pain meds and for the first time since surgery on Monday, took the muscle relaxer that I'd gone home with - and side note, let's hear it for an in-hospital pharmacy who filled everything and sent it up to recovery; one less errand for Jeff to do afterward.
On Thursday I felt so much better that I only ended up taking half the dose of the muscle relaxer before I went to bed; no pain meds. I thought that was really great - I've had so many pain meds in my system this year that not needing anything was better than good. The zaps continued.
I spent the rest of the week and weekend feeling sore from the actual back surgery but overall not too bad all things considered. I was trying very hard to rest and not do the things that were on the forbidden list for the first two weeks. These consisted of:
Which leads me to week two. On Monday I woke up and felt like myself again. I walked with my normal stride and while my back hurt a little, it mostly only bothered me getting on or off of something, like the couch or bed. And yes, I was still getting zaps of pain, yay.
But then came Tuesday. I woke up feeling good again, carefully swung my feet off the bed to start my day, took a step, and pain shot through my leg like fire. After catching my breath, I realized that this wasn't a zap of pain but rather, it was the same nerve pain in the same area - groin, front of thigh, and top of knee - that I'd been dealing with since this entire thing began back in March.
As you might imagine, I started going there: the surgery didn't work, I'd accidentally bent too often, I'd twisted and messed it up...it was not a good place to be. Not only did this continue, but it started hurting worse than before the surgery. At the same time, I realized that the zaps were easing up and by Thursday I had my last one. Which meant that the irritation on the nerve from the surgery had stopped, and the nerve pain in my leg was an indication of a failed discectomy. It was hard not to think otherwise.
The pain continued to increase in intensity and duration. My despair was ramping up because if this didn't work, was I stuck living with nerve pain for the rest of my life? Jeff was trying to stay positive but even he got a little down as the leg pain happened again and again and again. There's a bit of a stigma with having back surgery as it's one of the more notorious in terms of failing, or being worse off than before, so you can probably understand why things looked bleaker and bleaker to us as I continued to hurt.
I had my two-week follow up appointment with the PA on Tuesday afternoon. I was blunt in telling him that not only was I hurting, but that I was hurting worse than before. He reassured me that I didn't screw it up with random accidental bending or twisting but rather, my nerve was extra irritated thanks to the disc fragment pressing on it, and then with the act of removing the disc fragment. He said it's not common to have an increase in intensity of nerve pain after a discectomy, but it's also not unheard of, either. I'm in the 10 - 20% of people who experience this. Of course I am.
My PA told me to continue with the bending and twisting limitations, and that I still should not start physical therapy or exercising, beyond walking as tolerated, for another two weeks. He also offered to prescribe a round of steroids to help speed this process along, which I jumped at. Anything to stop this pain. He thinks the steroids will get enough inflammation reduced that I should begin to feel better over the weekend. Please let that be the case!
So that's where I'm at as of about two and a half weeks post surgery. It hasn't been the miracle cure where I woke up with the nerve pain gone, and all I needed to do was recover from having back surgery; nope not at all. But my hopes are up once again and this time, I hope they stay up.
But let's back up to surgery day. After I got home I parked myself on the couch, had a light dinner, visited with Diane who'd brought me some flowers, and finally felt enough pain in my back to warrant some Tramadol. Of course I was really wary of taking anything thanks to how barfy I got from most everything I tried in the months leading up to this, but along with the pain meds I was also sent home with a prescription for an anti-nausea medication; I took both and fell asleep.
On Tuesday I woke up feeling crummy but not barfy, so I continued with the pain meds. Really it wasn't that bad but considering I'd spent enough time at 10 on the pain scale in the early months of the herniation, I decided to not go there if I could help it. The pain was mostly located in my back but I still had a little bit in my leg from the nerve. The other oddball thing was that I'd be perfectly still, standing or lying down, and I'd get the biggest ZAP of pain - it'd take my breath away for a moment. This was the nerve reacting to surgery, yay. When that happened for the first time I was glad I hadn't started tapering off Gabapentin just yet. I needed as much help as I could get for that nerve. It wasn't something that warranted taking Tramadol because it was too unpredictable - the zaps would just happen whenever they felt like happening.
Wednesday was my worst day with pain from the surgery - the incision area hurt plus my back ached pretty bad. That was the day I could also remove the dressing covering the incision, and even though it was covered with steri strips, I could see some deep red bruises forming. But hey, I got to take a shower, so that was great. Although it was also a challenge since the post-op instructions said to not let the shower spray hit the incision. I was paranoid that I'd accidentally turn with my back to the spray out of habit...let's face it, at 56 I've been showering for a lot of years without any thought going into which way I should be facing. I made it through that OK, feeling both better as well as beat afterward. I took the pain meds and for the first time since surgery on Monday, took the muscle relaxer that I'd gone home with - and side note, let's hear it for an in-hospital pharmacy who filled everything and sent it up to recovery; one less errand for Jeff to do afterward.
On Thursday I felt so much better that I only ended up taking half the dose of the muscle relaxer before I went to bed; no pain meds. I thought that was really great - I've had so many pain meds in my system this year that not needing anything was better than good. The zaps continued.
I spent the rest of the week and weekend feeling sore from the actual back surgery but overall not too bad all things considered. I was trying very hard to rest and not do the things that were on the forbidden list for the first two weeks. These consisted of:
- No bending forward beyond a 45 degree angle
- No twisting side to side
- No lifting anything over 15 lbs and if I had to carry something, to hold it close to my abdomen
- No driving
- No exercise or physical therapy
- And the big kicker, no sitting for longer than 20 minutes at a time
Which leads me to week two. On Monday I woke up and felt like myself again. I walked with my normal stride and while my back hurt a little, it mostly only bothered me getting on or off of something, like the couch or bed. And yes, I was still getting zaps of pain, yay.
But then came Tuesday. I woke up feeling good again, carefully swung my feet off the bed to start my day, took a step, and pain shot through my leg like fire. After catching my breath, I realized that this wasn't a zap of pain but rather, it was the same nerve pain in the same area - groin, front of thigh, and top of knee - that I'd been dealing with since this entire thing began back in March.
As you might imagine, I started going there: the surgery didn't work, I'd accidentally bent too often, I'd twisted and messed it up...it was not a good place to be. Not only did this continue, but it started hurting worse than before the surgery. At the same time, I realized that the zaps were easing up and by Thursday I had my last one. Which meant that the irritation on the nerve from the surgery had stopped, and the nerve pain in my leg was an indication of a failed discectomy. It was hard not to think otherwise.
The pain continued to increase in intensity and duration. My despair was ramping up because if this didn't work, was I stuck living with nerve pain for the rest of my life? Jeff was trying to stay positive but even he got a little down as the leg pain happened again and again and again. There's a bit of a stigma with having back surgery as it's one of the more notorious in terms of failing, or being worse off than before, so you can probably understand why things looked bleaker and bleaker to us as I continued to hurt.
I had my two-week follow up appointment with the PA on Tuesday afternoon. I was blunt in telling him that not only was I hurting, but that I was hurting worse than before. He reassured me that I didn't screw it up with random accidental bending or twisting but rather, my nerve was extra irritated thanks to the disc fragment pressing on it, and then with the act of removing the disc fragment. He said it's not common to have an increase in intensity of nerve pain after a discectomy, but it's also not unheard of, either. I'm in the 10 - 20% of people who experience this. Of course I am.
My PA told me to continue with the bending and twisting limitations, and that I still should not start physical therapy or exercising, beyond walking as tolerated, for another two weeks. He also offered to prescribe a round of steroids to help speed this process along, which I jumped at. Anything to stop this pain. He thinks the steroids will get enough inflammation reduced that I should begin to feel better over the weekend. Please let that be the case!
So that's where I'm at as of about two and a half weeks post surgery. It hasn't been the miracle cure where I woke up with the nerve pain gone, and all I needed to do was recover from having back surgery; nope not at all. But my hopes are up once again and this time, I hope they stay up.
Monday, August 12, 2019
Geez Louise, Not Again
I wasn't sure what I would be writing about today but I didn't think it would be this, again. But dang it, just when I think I'm doing better with my herniated disc, and that the pain I have on a daily basis is tolerable (albeit with Gabapentin), I have a day like Saturday that reminds me that I am not done with this yet, not by a long shot.
I did some things on Saturday that WERE NORMAL, sheesh, but by late afternoon I was hurting much more than I have been, and it kept getting worse. And because I did some different things, I don't know what was the culprit, or if it was simply a case of overdoing it, which, come ON.
Possible culprits:
I sat on a metal chair at Blue Baker for a couple of hours. But I've been doing this for a month now without extra pain, so I don't think this was it.
Then I vacuumed the tile floors for the first time in months (Jeff has been taking care of this since my injury). Vacuuming is on the "don't do this" list, but we have a Dyson cordless stick vac, which is super lightweight. I didn't even push it back and forth like I normally would; instead I held it close to my body and walk forward in straight lines. OK a couple of times I bent forward to get it under some furniture, but I worked at doing it with the least possible movement. I didn't even empty the dirt cylinder - I had Jeff do that because it does take effort to pop it open.
After lazing around for a few hours, Jeff and I went to the mall to see a pop-up art show put on by our local art league. It's a small mall and we didn't have far to walk to get to the show, which was in an empty storefront. The show wasn't huge and we made the circle a couple of times but didn't see anything that needed to come home with us.
Then we walked a little way past the art show and found a Van's store, which I had to go into because it reminded me of California. After perusing everything and finding a cool t-shirt with the California bear on it but they only had mediums in women's sizes which are too small for me so sadly I left it there, I knew I'd had enough because I was starting to limp. So we walked back to our car.
Since we were really close, we drove to Bahama Buck's to get sno-cones. After several 100+ degree days with more to come, we thought that sounded good. So did about one hundred other people but luckily we got in before most of the mob and Jeff was able to snag a table while I ordered. Jeff took this picture of me because he said my teeth were turning green from my blue coconut sno-cone:
We planned out meals for the coming week and then we went home because I was really hurting with sharper pains than I've had in a while. This was disappointing as we figured the walking ended up being too much for me even though we'd only walked a short distance.
I pretty much spent the rest of the evening on my zero gravity chair, watching Veronica Mars - but hey, I finally made it to the newest season!
I went to bed in a lot of pain, thinking that the walking had caused this. When I woke up on Sunday I remembered that I'd vacuumed before the walk. So...was it the vacuuming? Or the walking? Or both? It would be nice to know, but I'm not ready to try either anytime soon while I get past this flare of pain. Oh and speaking of pain, I forgot that I could have taken an additional Gabapentin when the pain kicked in, instead of waiting to take my normal dose later in the evening. Thank you side effects of Gabapentin for that...I forgot that I'm an active participant in my pain management.
Last thing: At the urging of a lot of people, I've made an appointment with a neurosurgeon for a consultation about my herniated disc. I do not want to have surgery. But, as my PT pointed out, it might be good to know what is recommended, and if I didn't have surgery now (if the doctor does think it's necessary), what would I be looking at in a few years? The appointment isn't for another month; I'll let you know how it goes afterward.
I did some things on Saturday that WERE NORMAL, sheesh, but by late afternoon I was hurting much more than I have been, and it kept getting worse. And because I did some different things, I don't know what was the culprit, or if it was simply a case of overdoing it, which, come ON.
Possible culprits:
I sat on a metal chair at Blue Baker for a couple of hours. But I've been doing this for a month now without extra pain, so I don't think this was it.
Then I vacuumed the tile floors for the first time in months (Jeff has been taking care of this since my injury). Vacuuming is on the "don't do this" list, but we have a Dyson cordless stick vac, which is super lightweight. I didn't even push it back and forth like I normally would; instead I held it close to my body and walk forward in straight lines. OK a couple of times I bent forward to get it under some furniture, but I worked at doing it with the least possible movement. I didn't even empty the dirt cylinder - I had Jeff do that because it does take effort to pop it open.
After lazing around for a few hours, Jeff and I went to the mall to see a pop-up art show put on by our local art league. It's a small mall and we didn't have far to walk to get to the show, which was in an empty storefront. The show wasn't huge and we made the circle a couple of times but didn't see anything that needed to come home with us.
Then we walked a little way past the art show and found a Van's store, which I had to go into because it reminded me of California. After perusing everything and finding a cool t-shirt with the California bear on it but they only had mediums in women's sizes which are too small for me so sadly I left it there, I knew I'd had enough because I was starting to limp. So we walked back to our car.
Since we were really close, we drove to Bahama Buck's to get sno-cones. After several 100+ degree days with more to come, we thought that sounded good. So did about one hundred other people but luckily we got in before most of the mob and Jeff was able to snag a table while I ordered. Jeff took this picture of me because he said my teeth were turning green from my blue coconut sno-cone:
No green teeth here...my tongue was blue, though. But you can see the line of people snaking around the place. Also I put a filter on this shot because mannnnn, was I looking rough. Freckles and wrinkles and no makeup, oh my!
We planned out meals for the coming week and then we went home because I was really hurting with sharper pains than I've had in a while. This was disappointing as we figured the walking ended up being too much for me even though we'd only walked a short distance.
I pretty much spent the rest of the evening on my zero gravity chair, watching Veronica Mars - but hey, I finally made it to the newest season!
Yes we have a lawn chair in the living room - it adds to the decor, don't you agree? Actually it's folded up against the wall next to the patterned chair when I'm not using it, but the color is right for the room, at least.
I went to bed in a lot of pain, thinking that the walking had caused this. When I woke up on Sunday I remembered that I'd vacuumed before the walk. So...was it the vacuuming? Or the walking? Or both? It would be nice to know, but I'm not ready to try either anytime soon while I get past this flare of pain. Oh and speaking of pain, I forgot that I could have taken an additional Gabapentin when the pain kicked in, instead of waiting to take my normal dose later in the evening. Thank you side effects of Gabapentin for that...I forgot that I'm an active participant in my pain management.
Last thing: At the urging of a lot of people, I've made an appointment with a neurosurgeon for a consultation about my herniated disc. I do not want to have surgery. But, as my PT pointed out, it might be good to know what is recommended, and if I didn't have surgery now (if the doctor does think it's necessary), what would I be looking at in a few years? The appointment isn't for another month; I'll let you know how it goes afterward.
Monday, July 29, 2019
My Brain is Borked
I think I've mentioned that my brain has been foggy from the medicine I've been taking for my herniated disc, but it recently took a turn for the worse in the form of:
From Psychology Today:
It figures that this has hit me - if I can experience side effects, it seems like I will. Steroid injection? Check. Opioid withdrawal? Check. Chicken pox vaccine? Check. Oh yeah, let's not forget scopolamine (motion sickness patch) withdrawal - that was a fun one. Can I just say that I'm getting tired of this? Because I am.
Oh - I wanted to stop using the pain patch to see if I was feeling better because I might be getting some relief from the steroid injection, or if I was just getting really good pain management. It's a little of both - I do hurt a bit more, but so far I'm able to tolerate it without having to go back on the patch. Now if I can just move beyond PAWS, that would be swell.
P.S. One more thing to add to the list: as I was typing this post, I noticed that my fingers were blue. Turned them over and my palms were, too. I kept thinking that I knew my jeans had been washed enough to not bleed dye onto my hands but that's what it looked like. Finished the post and got up to wash the blue off my hands. Hey guess what? It didn't come off because my. hands. were. really. blue. HOW did that not occur to me? Sigh. Borked brain. Eventually they returned to normal, but geez.
- Writing a check with the recipient's address in the dollar amount line.
- Forgot to click my usual payment method for a meal service that we've been using pretty regularly for about six months, so when Jeff was picking it up, they said I clicked cash and boy was that a lovely mix up. Luckily they were really nice about it and let Jeff take the food without paying. He did tell them "my wife doesn't make mistakes like this but she's on some medicine that's working against her brain" and they were all "oh we know she always pays, we'll just run the card" - which is what I always click as payment when I order online.
- Wrote a check to our yard guy and put his name in the dollar amount line.
- Finally picked up my knitting needles after several months off. Continued with a sock that I'd started, going round and round for about an inch, which was fiddly on tiny needles but I did it. Then it was time for the heel. Had to look up how to do the heel I've done many times. Fine. Started that and about four rows in I'd both dropped a stitch and messed up a decrease. At least I was able to rip it back to the beginning without too much trouble.
- Since socks seemed to be too challenging, I pulled out a prewound skein of larger yarn, got out bigger needles, and decided to cast on for an easy hat. I had the yarn in my fingers correctly to begin the cast on, but had to stare at it for a minute before it came back to me as to how to do it. Got the correct number cast on and joined in the round to begin the K2, P2 ribbing. About 10 stitches in I realized I didn't actually join in the round and was just knitting a straight piece of fabric. Undid those stitches and correctly joined it in the round. Once again I began the K2, P2 ribbing. Got to the very end of the round and it was evident I would end on a K2, which is wrong. Looked back at my work to see if I went wrong toward the end, in which case I could tink back a few stitches, but no. I did it at the beginning. And then toward the middle. Two mistakes on the first round? Time to unravel and put it aside.
- I've been listening to a podcast while I do my PT exercises and I was telling Jeff about it - well, it's about a huge art theft from a museum decades ago and there's this psychiatrist who tricked a patient into giving him his house in the Hamptons and access to his fortune...and oh my god I've been listening to two different podcasts. No wonder I'm confused. The Shrink Next Door and Last Seen, in case you were interested/wondering.
From Psychology Today:
Post-acute withdrawal varies in intensity and duration from one person to another; again, usually in correlation with the intensity and duration of one’s substance use. Its manifestations can fluctuate in severity, coming and going in wave-like recurrences, and include impairments in energy, concentration, attention span, memory, sleep, appetite, and mood—most commonly anxiety, irritability, anger, and depression.Yep, that pretty much describes me, with the exception of depression because I'd started taking an antidepressant a month ago; I just couldn't stop crying, every day, for months. My doctor said I had situational depression and once all of this is behind me, I most likely won't need what I'm taking. Starting it before I stopped using the Butrans patch was an inadvertent stroke of good luck.
It figures that this has hit me - if I can experience side effects, it seems like I will. Steroid injection? Check. Opioid withdrawal? Check. Chicken pox vaccine? Check. Oh yeah, let's not forget scopolamine (motion sickness patch) withdrawal - that was a fun one. Can I just say that I'm getting tired of this? Because I am.
If you see this person, treat her like a 3-year-old, please.
Oh - I wanted to stop using the pain patch to see if I was feeling better because I might be getting some relief from the steroid injection, or if I was just getting really good pain management. It's a little of both - I do hurt a bit more, but so far I'm able to tolerate it without having to go back on the patch. Now if I can just move beyond PAWS, that would be swell.
P.S. One more thing to add to the list: as I was typing this post, I noticed that my fingers were blue. Turned them over and my palms were, too. I kept thinking that I knew my jeans had been washed enough to not bleed dye onto my hands but that's what it looked like. Finished the post and got up to wash the blue off my hands. Hey guess what? It didn't come off because my. hands. were. really. blue. HOW did that not occur to me? Sigh. Borked brain. Eventually they returned to normal, but geez.
Wednesday, July 17, 2019
Herniated Disc Update #3
Another month, another update. Actually I was emailing my PT who had asked for my blog link and I was telling her how I started it in 2008 so I could have a place to go back and see how far I'd come and how much work I was putting into my diet and OH MY GOD I'm doing the same thing only for a herniated disc. Isn't that a kick in the pants.
Well then. It has only been three months since my saga of the disc began. It feels like a lot longer than that, but I suspect that's what being in immense pain for more than two months will do to a person - it warps the timeline because of how long a day is when you hurt so bad. I hope to NEVER hurt like that again.
My second epidural steroid injection gave me the pain relief I needed for about five weeks. It wasn't 100% but it was a lot. Then the nerve pain started to come back at the groin area and yes, you guessed it, I found that out when I sat down. At least it didn't get horrible, but I was looking forward to my next injection very much.
I had my third visit with my pain doctor a week ago yesterday. After listening to my list of issues he said he was encouraged at the news of the pins and needles that I have been feeling many many many times a day, from my just below my knee to the entire front of my shin. He said that the nerve was waking back up which meant all of this was working. I can put up with it; it's annoying as you might imagine, but it doesn't hurt, and if it means that I'm healing, then that's OK.
We went over my medications and I asked if I could stop using the Butrans patch, reason being that I'm feeling better - but am I feeling better because of the injection, or because of the pain meds, or both? He was good with that and also good with my request for a prescription of the lowest dosage of Butrans just in case I end up feeling more pain than I'd like after I stop using the higher dosage patches. I'd love to get by with just Aleve, and of course, the Gabapentin, which is the nerve medicine.
It looks like Gabapentin and I are going to be friends for quite a while. I wasn't sure it was doing anything until I missed my evening meds one night; the following day my leg felt like it had creepy crawlies going up and down from the inside. Which is different from the pins and needles, in case you were wondering. Anyway, yes, it's working. It's also giving me some lovely side effects in the form of brain fog, clumsiness, and shaking hands. We discussed cutting down the dose but for now I'm going to try taking the entire dose in the evening to see if it helps with the side effects.
I appreciated it so much when my doctor and the woman in the treatment room - I know her name but not what her medical title is - both said independently of each other that they wanted me to be an active participant in my pain management and gave me the option to change up when I took the Gabapentin, and how if I had a particularly bad flare of pain, I could take an additional tablet earlier in the day, and also to call them if I felt like something wasn't working and they'd work with me to get me something that would help. I don't have to wait six weeks between appointments to make a medicine change and that was good to hear. I feel a little more empowered as I go through this herniated disc recovery.
I had my third epidural steroid injection that day, done the same way as the previous one, which was transforaminal (going in through the side of the vertebrae instead in the middle). Everything went well, Jeff took me home to lay flat on the couch for the rest of the day, which I did like the model patient I am. I felt really good the following day and even got myself dressed decently to go pick up a prescription and then go audition new purses:
Based on how things went for the last two injections, I knew that I'd feel crummy the second day after the injection and was prepared for a day of nausea and misery. But it didn't happen, and I thought well hey, maybe my body is becoming accustomed to these steroid injections.
Uh, that would be a no. Toward the evening I had the steroid flush - my cheeks got really red and I got hot. My head got hot. My hair got hot. Oh yeah, and I was nauseated. I went to bed with an ice pack on my head and a barf bag at my side, just in case. The next day shaking was added to the aforementioned side effects. And depression and despair because I was so freaking tired of feeling crappy. The flush would happen, I'd run a little fever for an hour or so while my head was hot, and then it would ease up for a bit. It was a rollercoaster of redness, hot hair, fever, shaking, depression, and despair (which are called 'mood swings' in the list of side effects...no, they are MOOD SWINGS) until Sunday morning. I might get a few hours' relief and think OK, it's over and then bam, it would happen again.
I can't wait to get another injection in six weeks. Said with some sarcasm. OK a lot. As long as I keep getting better and better I'll put up with the after effects, but I'm not looking forward to them...who would?
Well then. It has only been three months since my saga of the disc began. It feels like a lot longer than that, but I suspect that's what being in immense pain for more than two months will do to a person - it warps the timeline because of how long a day is when you hurt so bad. I hope to NEVER hurt like that again.
My second epidural steroid injection gave me the pain relief I needed for about five weeks. It wasn't 100% but it was a lot. Then the nerve pain started to come back at the groin area and yes, you guessed it, I found that out when I sat down. At least it didn't get horrible, but I was looking forward to my next injection very much.
I had my third visit with my pain doctor a week ago yesterday. After listening to my list of issues he said he was encouraged at the news of the pins and needles that I have been feeling many many many times a day, from my just below my knee to the entire front of my shin. He said that the nerve was waking back up which meant all of this was working. I can put up with it; it's annoying as you might imagine, but it doesn't hurt, and if it means that I'm healing, then that's OK.
We went over my medications and I asked if I could stop using the Butrans patch, reason being that I'm feeling better - but am I feeling better because of the injection, or because of the pain meds, or both? He was good with that and also good with my request for a prescription of the lowest dosage of Butrans just in case I end up feeling more pain than I'd like after I stop using the higher dosage patches. I'd love to get by with just Aleve, and of course, the Gabapentin, which is the nerve medicine.
It looks like Gabapentin and I are going to be friends for quite a while. I wasn't sure it was doing anything until I missed my evening meds one night; the following day my leg felt like it had creepy crawlies going up and down from the inside. Which is different from the pins and needles, in case you were wondering. Anyway, yes, it's working. It's also giving me some lovely side effects in the form of brain fog, clumsiness, and shaking hands. We discussed cutting down the dose but for now I'm going to try taking the entire dose in the evening to see if it helps with the side effects.
I appreciated it so much when my doctor and the woman in the treatment room - I know her name but not what her medical title is - both said independently of each other that they wanted me to be an active participant in my pain management and gave me the option to change up when I took the Gabapentin, and how if I had a particularly bad flare of pain, I could take an additional tablet earlier in the day, and also to call them if I felt like something wasn't working and they'd work with me to get me something that would help. I don't have to wait six weeks between appointments to make a medicine change and that was good to hear. I feel a little more empowered as I go through this herniated disc recovery.
I had my third epidural steroid injection that day, done the same way as the previous one, which was transforaminal (going in through the side of the vertebrae instead in the middle). Everything went well, Jeff took me home to lay flat on the couch for the rest of the day, which I did like the model patient I am. I felt really good the following day and even got myself dressed decently to go pick up a prescription and then go audition new purses:
Doesn't everybody empty out the paper stuffing from store purses and put the contents of their current purse inside to see if it's a good fit? And then take some pictures so you can go home and ponder the finalists? Also, ya think I like blue? I didn't realize how much blue I had going on there, with my dress, phone case, and purse.
Based on how things went for the last two injections, I knew that I'd feel crummy the second day after the injection and was prepared for a day of nausea and misery. But it didn't happen, and I thought well hey, maybe my body is becoming accustomed to these steroid injections.
Uh, that would be a no. Toward the evening I had the steroid flush - my cheeks got really red and I got hot. My head got hot. My hair got hot. Oh yeah, and I was nauseated. I went to bed with an ice pack on my head and a barf bag at my side, just in case. The next day shaking was added to the aforementioned side effects. And depression and despair because I was so freaking tired of feeling crappy. The flush would happen, I'd run a little fever for an hour or so while my head was hot, and then it would ease up for a bit. It was a rollercoaster of redness, hot hair, fever, shaking, depression, and despair (which are called 'mood swings' in the list of side effects...no, they are MOOD SWINGS) until Sunday morning. I might get a few hours' relief and think OK, it's over and then bam, it would happen again.
I can't wait to get another injection in six weeks. Said with some sarcasm. OK a lot. As long as I keep getting better and better I'll put up with the after effects, but I'm not looking forward to them...who would?
Wednesday, June 12, 2019
WWW - In Which I Go To Physical Therapy
I finally started physical therapy last week - Thursday, to be exact. The reason why it took a while to get started was the therapist that I chose: she is the owner of the practice and is the only physical therapist that patients see; as you might imagine, that appeals to a lot of people so she books up fast. With an injury as complex as a herniated disc, I didn't want to be just another cog in the machine at a large physical therapy clinic, seeing whoever was open at my appointment time - I wanted a therapist who I could trust implicitly, and that is Amanda Lightsey.
I first met her about 15 years ago when I worked as a service associate at the physical therapy clinic of the local healthcare center - she was fairly new in her field but I saw how invested she was with each patient and I could tell she did good work. Then several years ago while I was running one of our regular Saturday routes I passed a storefront with her name on it - she'd started her own practice! I was really pleased to see that and tucked the info away in case I ever needed to go to physical therapy. Boy howdy did that come true. After the first session I knew I was right to wait to get into her practice - I left with a lot of hope for a full recovery from the herniated disc without having surgery. Here's a picture of us after the second session:
My first visit consisted of an evaluation, both physical, with Amanda taking measurements of how far I could move my legs in different ways, and practical, with questions on limitations that I was experiencing, etc. Also there were tears when she asked how my injury had affected my social life. Luckily she had Kleenex nearby. She said it was quite normal for patients who had been active to go into a depression when everything is taken away, and through my tears I felt better knowing that this was a normal reaction to having your life turn to crap.
After the evaluation it was time to get down to business. She showed me three different exercises to do, isolating certain areas as I did them. One was to do a bridge using only your glutes to rise up, with no involvement of the abs. Isolating just the one muscle group was hard, physically and mentally. I have never had to use my brain so much to work out, but to quote Ralph Wiggum, I'm learning!
I did a couple other exercises including the log roll and the triangle tilt. Even with the handouts she gave me, I was a little confused once I tried them at home, so I did my best but I was glad my second appointment was just a few days away. Turns out I was nearly correct with the log roll, but the I needed a new tutorial with the triangle tilt. I appreciated that Amanda had a different way to approach that one, and once she had me practice that way, I felt more confident with it. I had her take some pictures of me doing it the right way so when I lost my bearings at home with it, I had a point of reference:
At my second visit not only did we take pictures, but she demonstrated two of the new exercises while I videoed them and that was super helpful later on at home - I'd watch the video to review, then do the exercise with more confidence. The new exercises were Chaplins, sit and tilt (I've named that one, it had a four word name that was cumbersome and hard to say so sit and tilt it is, LOL), and the table top. I was sweaty and my left leg was shaking like Jello when I finished that session. I also felt so good! I haven't been able to really move like that in a long time and I daresay I had the tiniest bit of endorphins kick in.
I'm to do my exercises 2 - 3 times a day, stopping each one when I'm fatigued. At that point the form is lost and it's time to give my body a rest. My left leg knee was pretty sore yesterday, in an area that is different from my normal nerve pain, so that's interesting and if it keeps up I'll email her to see if I should change things up, plus all the muscles were sore in both legs. I really got a work out!
After Monday's session I went directly to Starbucks and got an iced coffee:
I first met her about 15 years ago when I worked as a service associate at the physical therapy clinic of the local healthcare center - she was fairly new in her field but I saw how invested she was with each patient and I could tell she did good work. Then several years ago while I was running one of our regular Saturday routes I passed a storefront with her name on it - she'd started her own practice! I was really pleased to see that and tucked the info away in case I ever needed to go to physical therapy. Boy howdy did that come true. After the first session I knew I was right to wait to get into her practice - I left with a lot of hope for a full recovery from the herniated disc without having surgery. Here's a picture of us after the second session:
Amanda and I - don't you love our matching pink sneakers? If I hadn't known her for so long I would call her Dr. Lightsey, but she's still Amanda to me.
My first visit consisted of an evaluation, both physical, with Amanda taking measurements of how far I could move my legs in different ways, and practical, with questions on limitations that I was experiencing, etc. Also there were tears when she asked how my injury had affected my social life. Luckily she had Kleenex nearby. She said it was quite normal for patients who had been active to go into a depression when everything is taken away, and through my tears I felt better knowing that this was a normal reaction to having your life turn to crap.
After the evaluation it was time to get down to business. She showed me three different exercises to do, isolating certain areas as I did them. One was to do a bridge using only your glutes to rise up, with no involvement of the abs. Isolating just the one muscle group was hard, physically and mentally. I have never had to use my brain so much to work out, but to quote Ralph Wiggum, I'm learning!
I did a couple other exercises including the log roll and the triangle tilt. Even with the handouts she gave me, I was a little confused once I tried them at home, so I did my best but I was glad my second appointment was just a few days away. Turns out I was nearly correct with the log roll, but the I needed a new tutorial with the triangle tilt. I appreciated that Amanda had a different way to approach that one, and once she had me practice that way, I felt more confident with it. I had her take some pictures of me doing it the right way so when I lost my bearings at home with it, I had a point of reference:
Everything begins with the glutes.
At my second visit not only did we take pictures, but she demonstrated two of the new exercises while I videoed them and that was super helpful later on at home - I'd watch the video to review, then do the exercise with more confidence. The new exercises were Chaplins, sit and tilt (I've named that one, it had a four word name that was cumbersome and hard to say so sit and tilt it is, LOL), and the table top. I was sweaty and my left leg was shaking like Jello when I finished that session. I also felt so good! I haven't been able to really move like that in a long time and I daresay I had the tiniest bit of endorphins kick in.
I'm to do my exercises 2 - 3 times a day, stopping each one when I'm fatigued. At that point the form is lost and it's time to give my body a rest. My left leg knee was pretty sore yesterday, in an area that is different from my normal nerve pain, so that's interesting and if it keeps up I'll email her to see if I should change things up, plus all the muscles were sore in both legs. I really got a work out!
After Monday's session I went directly to Starbucks and got an iced coffee:
Vanilla sweet cream cold brew - a nice treat after my intense PT session!
I was surprised to receive a Starbucks gift card in my email shortly after Monday's post went live, with a nice note of encouragement from one of my readers, Karen R. It made my day that someone who I've never met did something so nice for me. Thanks again, Karen!
Monday, June 10, 2019
Herniated Disc Update #2
It's been a while since my last post about my herniated disc, so I thought I'd update you guys with what's been happening. When I last left you, I had been given my first epidural steroid injection and was waiting for the steroid to kick in and relieve me of some of the nerve pain. It never did, which was incredibly disheartening. So except for the change in pain meds to a Butrans patch that I wore on my arm for a week at a time, nothing was different, including my pain levels. We went to North Carolina as planned because I was tired of this injury stopping me from doing everything, and while I had some good distraction by being with Sam and my parents, I was hurting really bad and was taking Motrin all the time.
On the drive back, I was at a 9.5 on the pain scale, and feeling despair at ever getting better because the first epidural injection didn't work, the pain meds were barely helping, and I'd read a lot of stories online about other people living like this for years. YEARS. In tears (there's been a lot of tears since this happened), I called my pain management doctor's office and asked if I could get some prescription-strength ibuprofen. Kristen, the PA, called me back said if I was needing to take that much Motrin, we needed to change the pain meds. Luckily it was only changing the Butrans patch from 5mg to 10mg - nothing new since all of the previous pain meds I'd tried had made me incredibly nauseous, and increasing the dosage on Gabapentin, which is my nerve pain medicine. Plus she told me to stop taking the Motrin altogether and take Aleve instead - two tablets every twelve hours. I'm not sure what helped, or maybe it was everything, but I did get some relief and stopped wanting to throw myself out of the moving car.
While I was on the phone with Kristen I told her that I was worried about getting another epidural since the first one didn't work. She went over my MRI again while talking to me, and said that there was more than one way to do the injection to get the steroid in the right spot, and she'd get with the doctor about me. She was very reassuring and I had a glimmer of hope after talking with her, like maybe, just maybe, I might stop hurting so bad...most days my pain seesawed between a 7 - 8 on a scale of 10, with jabs of 9+ occasionally.
I still had about two and a half weeks to go until my second injection, so back to the couch for me for most of my day. I still couldn't sit in a chair for more than a few minutes, if at all - there were many times when I'd sit down for dinner only to immediately stand up and I would have to eat my dinner while standing. I also couldn't really drive because I couldn't sit upright in a car seat. Oh and there was that whole brain fog from the pain meds thing, too - I couldn't concentrate enough to read a page from a book, or knit, or watch a movie. I could make it through a short sitcom sometimes, but that was about it. So mostly I was doing nothing.
This is a very isolating injury. I went from going to BCS Fitness three times a week, and running three times a week - always with either a group at my workouts or with Jeff, Diane, and the Renegades - to nothing. I was hurting too much to go out, and I couldn't drive, so I was home alone, miserable, and alternating between losing hope that I'd ever be without this excruciating pain to being optimistic that maybe my upcoming injection would work. But mostly I was depressed. I have gone through a lot of Kleenex since this happened. Thankfully Diane came over just about every day after work and sat with me for a couple of hours, otherwise the only person I would see was Jeff. I have a couple friends who check on me via text which is really nice. But being cut off from about 98% of my social group contributed to my feeling of depression.
I'm not saying all of this to make you guys feel bad for me. I'm documenting my experience with a herniated disc in case another sufferer comes across my blog; maybe they will feel a kinship with what I'm going through and maybe they won't feel so alone. And maybe they'll get some hope from my treatment plan.
So. That was the dark side of having a herniated disc. I am now standing - no wait...SITTING - on the sunny side. I had my second steroid epidural 11 days ago as of today and it has helped tremendously. My team (PA and doctor) were hoping for 60% reduction in pain. I would say I've gotten more like 80% and I am so relieved! Not only for the pain mostly being gone, but because my doctor said that the MRI showed a fragment of the herniated disc had broken off and was pressing against the nerve right at L3, and if that injection didn't work, we would need to discuss getting with a neurosurgeon to remove the fragment and part of the disc.
The reason why this injection worked is because my doctor went in lower than the previous time. This go-round he was right at the bottom of the L3 area, and kind of curved the needle around to right where the disc fragment was. He touched the nerve a few times while making sure he was getting to the right spot and my leg zinged when that happened. This took a little longer than the first injection but I didn't care as long as it worked. And it did! He does this under a live X-ray so he can see the needle and move it into position, injecting dye to check. This is a picture of my spine with the needle in place, with the dye:
And now, I'm paranoid. So many people have said that their injection only worked for a week, or two, or three, and then the pain came back. Every time I sit down I wait for the familiar sharp pain to hit. So far it's been good - none of that pain. My thigh will still throb at times and my knee hurts, but nothing like before. The only addition I've had is that when I stand up after I've been sitting, I get pins and needles from my knee down for a few minutes. This happens every time I sit. It's annoying but I'm used to it.
When an injection works, the next one will help even more - it's a cumulative effect. I am scheduled for another injection in early July and am hoping to get one more before September 1, when our year begins again with insurance. And then I don't think I will need any more injections for a while, which would be fine with me.
I have to be very careful with my spine, even though it never hurt and still doesn't. But the point of these injections is to get some of the swelling down from the herniated disc to take the pressure off the nerve root. I'm not to lift anything above my head, or bend forward too much, or lift much of anything at all. It's hard to remember to be cautious sometimes because it's automatic with me to do normal things like bending down to unload the dishwasher and taking out several heavy Fiestaware plates to put in the cupboard. So even though I'm feeling better, most of the housework is still on Jeff.
I had my first physical therapy appointment last week and my second one is later on this morning. I'll write more about that on Wednesday.
So...after two and a half months of pure hell, I finally got some relief from the pain. I credit having a doctor who is a working anesthesiologist and has the knowledge to do the injection a different way, and for the skill to move that needle around to just the right spot. This is why I chose him when I was first diagnosed with a herniated disc - I checked out all of the pain management places in town and I liked the idea that he was still working at hospitals, helping patients with different needs, and not just running a pain clinic.
Thanks for sticking with me over the last few months - I am hoping SO MUCH that the second injection is signaling the beginning of the end of this nightmare. Nerve pain is unbearable and I would not wish it on anyone. Now, please keep your fingers crossed for me that the injection lasts for the entire six weeks.
On the drive back, I was at a 9.5 on the pain scale, and feeling despair at ever getting better because the first epidural injection didn't work, the pain meds were barely helping, and I'd read a lot of stories online about other people living like this for years. YEARS. In tears (there's been a lot of tears since this happened), I called my pain management doctor's office and asked if I could get some prescription-strength ibuprofen. Kristen, the PA, called me back said if I was needing to take that much Motrin, we needed to change the pain meds. Luckily it was only changing the Butrans patch from 5mg to 10mg - nothing new since all of the previous pain meds I'd tried had made me incredibly nauseous, and increasing the dosage on Gabapentin, which is my nerve pain medicine. Plus she told me to stop taking the Motrin altogether and take Aleve instead - two tablets every twelve hours. I'm not sure what helped, or maybe it was everything, but I did get some relief and stopped wanting to throw myself out of the moving car.
While I was on the phone with Kristen I told her that I was worried about getting another epidural since the first one didn't work. She went over my MRI again while talking to me, and said that there was more than one way to do the injection to get the steroid in the right spot, and she'd get with the doctor about me. She was very reassuring and I had a glimmer of hope after talking with her, like maybe, just maybe, I might stop hurting so bad...most days my pain seesawed between a 7 - 8 on a scale of 10, with jabs of 9+ occasionally.
I still had about two and a half weeks to go until my second injection, so back to the couch for me for most of my day. I still couldn't sit in a chair for more than a few minutes, if at all - there were many times when I'd sit down for dinner only to immediately stand up and I would have to eat my dinner while standing. I also couldn't really drive because I couldn't sit upright in a car seat. Oh and there was that whole brain fog from the pain meds thing, too - I couldn't concentrate enough to read a page from a book, or knit, or watch a movie. I could make it through a short sitcom sometimes, but that was about it. So mostly I was doing nothing.
This is a very isolating injury. I went from going to BCS Fitness three times a week, and running three times a week - always with either a group at my workouts or with Jeff, Diane, and the Renegades - to nothing. I was hurting too much to go out, and I couldn't drive, so I was home alone, miserable, and alternating between losing hope that I'd ever be without this excruciating pain to being optimistic that maybe my upcoming injection would work. But mostly I was depressed. I have gone through a lot of Kleenex since this happened. Thankfully Diane came over just about every day after work and sat with me for a couple of hours, otherwise the only person I would see was Jeff. I have a couple friends who check on me via text which is really nice. But being cut off from about 98% of my social group contributed to my feeling of depression.
I'm not saying all of this to make you guys feel bad for me. I'm documenting my experience with a herniated disc in case another sufferer comes across my blog; maybe they will feel a kinship with what I'm going through and maybe they won't feel so alone. And maybe they'll get some hope from my treatment plan.
So. That was the dark side of having a herniated disc. I am now standing - no wait...SITTING - on the sunny side. I had my second steroid epidural 11 days ago as of today and it has helped tremendously. My team (PA and doctor) were hoping for 60% reduction in pain. I would say I've gotten more like 80% and I am so relieved! Not only for the pain mostly being gone, but because my doctor said that the MRI showed a fragment of the herniated disc had broken off and was pressing against the nerve right at L3, and if that injection didn't work, we would need to discuss getting with a neurosurgeon to remove the fragment and part of the disc.
The reason why this injection worked is because my doctor went in lower than the previous time. This go-round he was right at the bottom of the L3 area, and kind of curved the needle around to right where the disc fragment was. He touched the nerve a few times while making sure he was getting to the right spot and my leg zinged when that happened. This took a little longer than the first injection but I didn't care as long as it worked. And it did! He does this under a live X-ray so he can see the needle and move it into position, injecting dye to check. This is a picture of my spine with the needle in place, with the dye:
The injection sweet spot!
And now, I'm paranoid. So many people have said that their injection only worked for a week, or two, or three, and then the pain came back. Every time I sit down I wait for the familiar sharp pain to hit. So far it's been good - none of that pain. My thigh will still throb at times and my knee hurts, but nothing like before. The only addition I've had is that when I stand up after I've been sitting, I get pins and needles from my knee down for a few minutes. This happens every time I sit. It's annoying but I'm used to it.
When an injection works, the next one will help even more - it's a cumulative effect. I am scheduled for another injection in early July and am hoping to get one more before September 1, when our year begins again with insurance. And then I don't think I will need any more injections for a while, which would be fine with me.
I have to be very careful with my spine, even though it never hurt and still doesn't. But the point of these injections is to get some of the swelling down from the herniated disc to take the pressure off the nerve root. I'm not to lift anything above my head, or bend forward too much, or lift much of anything at all. It's hard to remember to be cautious sometimes because it's automatic with me to do normal things like bending down to unload the dishwasher and taking out several heavy Fiestaware plates to put in the cupboard. So even though I'm feeling better, most of the housework is still on Jeff.
I had my first physical therapy appointment last week and my second one is later on this morning. I'll write more about that on Wednesday.
So...after two and a half months of pure hell, I finally got some relief from the pain. I credit having a doctor who is a working anesthesiologist and has the knowledge to do the injection a different way, and for the skill to move that needle around to just the right spot. This is why I chose him when I was first diagnosed with a herniated disc - I checked out all of the pain management places in town and I liked the idea that he was still working at hospitals, helping patients with different needs, and not just running a pain clinic.
Thanks for sticking with me over the last few months - I am hoping SO MUCH that the second injection is signaling the beginning of the end of this nightmare. Nerve pain is unbearable and I would not wish it on anyone. Now, please keep your fingers crossed for me that the injection lasts for the entire six weeks.
Look at me, sitting and blogging like a normal person!
Monday, June 3, 2019
I Turned 106 Years Old Yesterday
Not really, I actually only turned 56, but I've been feeling like I'm about 106 for the last couple of months, so there you go. Instead of marking my birthday with a run, I marked it with food...I'll have more on that in Wednesday's post. After last year's 5.5 mile run where I ended up getting heat exhaustion I swore off running that many miles in June because in case you haven't heard, it's freaking hot in Texas in June.
I had hoped to do something different to mark the occasion, either by running .56 miles or by doing something with 56 reps or calories burned at my workout, but nope, that was not happening. Which is just another reason why I've been feeling so old and decrepit - this person who has pretty much laid on the couch for the last two months is not who I am. Well, it is. But I don't like it.
I've really not felt any particular age as I've moved through life - I've just been me, at whatever age, living life. But as my birthday got closer, it was a reminder that I AM GETTING OLDER. I know, I'm as shocked as you are!
This is the first year where I haven't been able to meet my new age with as much acceptance as I have in years past. I mean, I'm OK with being 56, but I'm not so OK with being 56 and having a herniated disc that apparently will always be around, interrupting my life and providing me with the worst kind of pain I've ever experienced. Nonstop pain. And apparently even if I get better, I will not be able to do certain physical activities ever again, unless I want to make this issue even worse. Which I do not, believe me. It's the pain and limitations that make me feel like I'm 106 instead of 56. I don't know what is ahead of me as I go through life as a 56-year-old and for the first time, I'm a little fearful of what it might be.
All that aside, I did have a good birthday. The epidural steroid injection that I had on Thursday afternoon seems to have helped a bit, which made it easier to contemplate putting on a decent outfit and going out to brunch, and I'm glad, because brunch was delicious and I was able to sit at a table for an hour and a half! Just a week ago I couldn't have done that for more than five minutes, so let's hear it for the miracle of modern medicine!
Once I got dressed and made up, I had Jeff take my picture, of course:
I had lots of well wishes via email, text, and Facebook, and I spoke to my parents too. All in all, not bad for turning 106...er, 56.
I had hoped to do something different to mark the occasion, either by running .56 miles or by doing something with 56 reps or calories burned at my workout, but nope, that was not happening. Which is just another reason why I've been feeling so old and decrepit - this person who has pretty much laid on the couch for the last two months is not who I am. Well, it is. But I don't like it.
I've really not felt any particular age as I've moved through life - I've just been me, at whatever age, living life. But as my birthday got closer, it was a reminder that I AM GETTING OLDER. I know, I'm as shocked as you are!
This is the first year where I haven't been able to meet my new age with as much acceptance as I have in years past. I mean, I'm OK with being 56, but I'm not so OK with being 56 and having a herniated disc that apparently will always be around, interrupting my life and providing me with the worst kind of pain I've ever experienced. Nonstop pain. And apparently even if I get better, I will not be able to do certain physical activities ever again, unless I want to make this issue even worse. Which I do not, believe me. It's the pain and limitations that make me feel like I'm 106 instead of 56. I don't know what is ahead of me as I go through life as a 56-year-old and for the first time, I'm a little fearful of what it might be.
All that aside, I did have a good birthday. The epidural steroid injection that I had on Thursday afternoon seems to have helped a bit, which made it easier to contemplate putting on a decent outfit and going out to brunch, and I'm glad, because brunch was delicious and I was able to sit at a table for an hour and a half! Just a week ago I couldn't have done that for more than five minutes, so let's hear it for the miracle of modern medicine!
Once I got dressed and made up, I had Jeff take my picture, of course:
Me at 56 - I was surprised to still fit into my smaller clothes considering all of the lying around, no workouts/running, and loss of muscle tone.
I looked so tired in the full-body shot that I had to take a selfie in portrait mode - I don't know what happens with that setting, but my eyes looked a lot perkier!
Later on, a selfie wearing my birthday gift from Jeff - new sunglasses!
Even more later on, Diane came by with a plethora of birthday goodies to spoil me, including flowers, summery balloons, and one that says it all - It's all about ME on my birthday!
I had lots of well wishes via email, text, and Facebook, and I spoke to my parents too. All in all, not bad for turning 106...er, 56.
Monday, April 29, 2019
Herniated Disc Pain
Couches. Good for more than just sitting - this is my bed, my dining room, and now my office.
Seeing as things are not improving at the speed I'd like, Jeff moved my computer to the family room so I can lie down and blog. And take care of my banking, and of course read YOUR blogs and hey, maybe even comment now that it's easier to type and I don't have to fill in my info each time I comment.
I realize this might begin to bore some of you, what with me writing about my herniated disc so often, but as I've been searching out other people's stories online (yes, looking for a glimmer of hope), I'm not finding much, and zero with an L3 - L4 herniation, so who knows, maybe this will help out someone who has the misfortune of dealing with this. Also, I've been on the couch for over two weeks so it's not like I'm doing anything exciting to write about.
When I left you following last week's post, I was hoping to be one of the lucky ones who felt the epidural steroid injection begin to work on day seven. I was not. Today marks day eleven...could this finally be the day? Or will I have to wait the entire two weeks for relief? Or, and I hope this won't be the case, will I be one of the few for whom the injection doesn't work? I really, really hope not but I freely admit to going down that path of despair when the pain is at its worst.
Types of disc presentations. Mine is the red one.
Let's talk pain for a moment. Until now I thought I knew what bad pain was - after all, I've had gallbladder surgery, surgery for an ankle injury, pseudotumor cerebri, and of course, I've given birth twice.
None of these come close to how badly I hurt now. The herniated disc is pressing on a nerve in my spinal column. Nerve pain is almost indescribably agonizing - and I do not use that word lightly. My herniated disc is between the L3 - L4 section, and the nerve there runs down the front of my left leg. I hurt on the outer edge of my glute, in the crease where my leg meets my torso, in my thigh muscle, in my knee, and a little down the front of my shin. Even though the herniated disc is in my back, my back does not hurt because it all depends on the location of the herniation; if this was happening in the next set of vertebrae, then yes, my back would be feeling all of this instead of my leg.
Each spot has a different type of pain - for example my thigh pain is deep down, and I try to press on it, kneading it with my hand, when it's really bad. My thigh has lots of tiny bruises as a result.
The crease pain is sharp and throbbing, and I can barely sit upright without a shooting pain coming on within a minute.
The knee pain is hot and my kneecap feels like it's going to break in half. This one makes me cry the most.
The shin pain isn't that bad compared to the rest of the leg, or else it could be that everything else is so bad that this is small potatoes.
With all of this, you'd think I would welcome narcotic pain medications. Well, yes and no. Yes because if they relieve this pain, then I'm OK with taking them. But no because I do not like taking narcotics, I do not like how barfy they make me feel, and I do not like how my brain doesn't always fire correctly and I can't seem to form a coherent thought at times. We won't even go down the whole addiction issue...honestly, I'll deal with that later if need be.
I stopped taking the narcotic, Belbuca, last Thursday morning because we had tickets to see Avengers: Endgame on Friday afternoon and I was determined to feel good enough to see the movie - I did not want to have to leave the theater to barf. I felt pretty good just taking 400mg of Motrin every four hours on Thursday and Friday and we made it to the movie just fine. We both loved the movie and I'm thankful for reclining seats in the theater.
But late Friday evening the pain was back with a vengeance - and I was in tears and miserable for hours. I finally had to go back to the Belbuca, and anti-nausea meds, and Motrin as well because this was horrible - I was at a 9.5 on the pain scale of 0 - 10. For reference, when I was at the pain doctor the morning of my steroid injection, I was at a 10. I really hate that I cannot get by without the narcotic, but unfortunately this is where I'm at right now. I hope to report back soon with better news about the pain - cross your fingers for me that the epidural steroid injection kicks in...like, now.
Wednesday, April 24, 2019
Herniated Disc Update #1
Hey guys, thank you so much for all of the well wishes and sweet comments. Please don’t take my lack of response to each comment as me not caring; it’s just been really difficult to focus through this ordeal to write much.
I met with the pain doctor and his physician’s assistant on Thursday and thankfully they were able to squeeze me into a packed schedule for a steroid injection into my spine between the L3 - L4 area. This was done via an epidural...yes, an epidural like you get while you’re in labor.
The steroid injection is supposed to reduce the swelling of the nerve. I’ve been told it takes anywhere from 7 to 10 to 14 days to fully kick in. This afternoon will make day 6, and I’m really hoping to be one of the lucky ones who gets relief on day 7.
At that visit last Thursday I was prescribed a different pain medication because the other two I was taking were making me so nauseated, plus they really weren’t helping with the pain. Well, that medication did take my pain level down from a 10 to about an 8, but holy cow did I get super nauseated. Basically all I could do was lie down with my eyes closed. It’s a 12 hour drug and after spending Saturday in misery, I decided to not take my next dose. So, the nausea went away but the pain shot back up.
I called the physician's assistant on Monday morning and got a prescription for an anti-nausea drug. I didn’t want to try and switch pain meds at that point because everything seems to make me sick, plus our insurance required a written authorization for that prescription, which would take about a week to get, so we just paid for it ourselves...and we paid a lot. My PA also gave me a prescription for something that specifically targets nerve pain. I take it at night and this is something that takes weeks to fully kick in...why does everything take so long to work?
The good news is now that I’ve had a few doses of the expensive pain medication, my pain has lessened a bit. I can’t stand very long or walk across my house without my leg hurting immensely, and I still cannot sit in a chair because that 90 degree angle compresses the nerve too much. But I’m not groaning in pain and unable to find any comfortable position to lie in, so that’s a plus.
The bad news is that the anti-nausea medication is only helping a little. I get a few decent hours and then I’m back to feeling barfy. As you might guess, I’m writing this during one of my few decent hours stage.
I don’t know when I’ll be back to my regular blogging schedule, but I will be back one of these days. In the meantime I’ll leave you with some pictures of my constant companion.
I met with the pain doctor and his physician’s assistant on Thursday and thankfully they were able to squeeze me into a packed schedule for a steroid injection into my spine between the L3 - L4 area. This was done via an epidural...yes, an epidural like you get while you’re in labor.
The steroid injection is supposed to reduce the swelling of the nerve. I’ve been told it takes anywhere from 7 to 10 to 14 days to fully kick in. This afternoon will make day 6, and I’m really hoping to be one of the lucky ones who gets relief on day 7.
At that visit last Thursday I was prescribed a different pain medication because the other two I was taking were making me so nauseated, plus they really weren’t helping with the pain. Well, that medication did take my pain level down from a 10 to about an 8, but holy cow did I get super nauseated. Basically all I could do was lie down with my eyes closed. It’s a 12 hour drug and after spending Saturday in misery, I decided to not take my next dose. So, the nausea went away but the pain shot back up.
I called the physician's assistant on Monday morning and got a prescription for an anti-nausea drug. I didn’t want to try and switch pain meds at that point because everything seems to make me sick, plus our insurance required a written authorization for that prescription, which would take about a week to get, so we just paid for it ourselves...and we paid a lot. My PA also gave me a prescription for something that specifically targets nerve pain. I take it at night and this is something that takes weeks to fully kick in...why does everything take so long to work?
The good news is now that I’ve had a few doses of the expensive pain medication, my pain has lessened a bit. I can’t stand very long or walk across my house without my leg hurting immensely, and I still cannot sit in a chair because that 90 degree angle compresses the nerve too much. But I’m not groaning in pain and unable to find any comfortable position to lie in, so that’s a plus.
The bad news is that the anti-nausea medication is only helping a little. I get a few decent hours and then I’m back to feeling barfy. As you might guess, I’m writing this during one of my few decent hours stage.
I don’t know when I’ll be back to my regular blogging schedule, but I will be back one of these days. In the meantime I’ll leave you with some pictures of my constant companion.
Laying on me didn’t last too long as it hurt.
Laying behind me...better, but every time I’d move to adjust to the pain it disturbed him and then it took an annoyingly long time to get him settled again.
Yesterday morning he stayed in his bed. I think we were both more comfortable this way.
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