First things first...I got in my exercise for both Saturday and Sunday - yay! Went for a 5.72 mile bike ride on Saturday (was aiming for 6 miles, but Ginger came out and Paco wanted to play with her, so I cut it short) and I did a bunch of arm and back exercises using my new exertube-thingie! I have to say, I was confused at first because the tube has a dealie that slid around it...finally read the instructions and saw that you can shut it in your door - either on the side or on top - and do additional exercises. Note to self: make sure the dealie is secure in the door or it will smack you in the head - that was a surprise! Anyway, it was very cool - I was able to do some things that I remembered from my workouts that really work my triceps and shoulders. Lather, rinse, repeat for Sunday (except that I only rode 5 miles). I have to say that it's a little different riding my bike around the neighborhood without Jeff...for one thing, it's a kind of boring. Also, strangers tend to holler "hi" a bit more often. I'm proud of myself for doing it, and also for riding for so long - I've never gone past 5 1/2 miles.
And now onto body image. This might sound strange, but even though in my head I know that I've lost a ton of weight, and have bought clothes in progressively smaller sizes as a result, sometimes I still think of myself as fat.
I had a terrible fat day on Friday - just felt very big, bloated and blech. Partway through the day I caught sight of myself in the bathroom mirror and was really depressed by what I saw. Spent the rest of the day wondering if I would ever be thin. Went home, and as I was changing into comfy, lounge-around-the-house clothes, I looked at the sizes of what I was wearing: XL navy sweater shell (that I bought almost a year ago), L orange cardigan (bought last Feb/March) and size 12 brown capris - and realized that everything was really baggy on me. No wonder I felt so blah - I looked it! I threw everything into the laundry and then folded them for the Goodwill bag. And proceeded to try on and clear out my closet of more clothes that are too big. Yes, I could probably get away with wearing some of them, but not at the expense of feeling so crummy about myself.
So I'm down to 3 pairs of capris (plus the one pair of bermudas that are a bit too tight to wear in public yet). I need to get a pair of jeans - it rained last Thursday and I actually would have worn long pants to work had I owned a pair. So I'll be shopping this week - something that I'm actually trying NOT to do much of since we need every extra penny for our Hawaii trip. But I can spare a little bit in order to save me from my mental beat-down.
Friday weigh in
13 hours ago