Monday, June 8, 2015

Getting Comfy, Settling In...

I'm sure I'm not alone in saying that I am my own worst critic when it comes to seeing pictures of myself.  It's pretty normal to have those UGH moments, especially when you think you're looking fairly decent, but a photograph says otherwise.  I know for me as I lost weight, moved down into smaller sizes, and took progress pictures, I'd still have those instances of unhappy shock, because those pictures didn't represent how good I was feeling about myself, and more often than not, I'd focus on how bad I looked in them.

But over the last couple of years I've had moments where I'll see a picture of myself  and my first thought isn't immediately critical (ugh, that stomach, ugh, those arms/thighs).  So I wonder - am I finally getting to the point in life where I can objectively see myself, and what's more, appreciate what I see?  Don't get me wrong - it's not like I'm looking at pictures of myself and thinking "damn girl, you fiiine" - LOL for days at that thought! 

Here's the thing:  I spend a lot of time wearing running clothes, which are great for exposing every flaw my body has.  I also document a lot of my runs and races with photographs, so I get to see those flaws when I'm at my worst - hair not styled, no make up, red-faced, and sweaty.  But those pictures have also contributed to times when I've felt the best about myself, and even though the waistband of my running capris might be cutting into my stomach to give me the worst Michelin Man look ever, I'm able to look beyond that to see the entire picture, so to speak - and lately, I've been liking what I see:
The flaws are there, and quite visible, but these pictures made me feel happy instead of upset or depressed about my body.

I'm finally figuring out how to dress my new body - I'm learning how to downplay things I don't like, while choosing styles that make me feel good.  I used to avoid flowy tops because I associated them with my pre-weight-loss days, when I felt like I was wearing a tent.  But by choosing the right cut and size, I manage to hide what I don't love about my body, while feeling pretty darn stylish in the process:
Of course, the MINI lanyard complements the outfit immensely...

All I know is that when I saw this picture, I was inordinately pleased:
Me, the morning of my 52nd birthday.  No make up, no nice hairstyle, still sweaty after running 5.2 miles.  

My body flaws are still there, and the uncropped shot is not flattering when it comes to my stomach rolls.  But what I'm able to focus on is a content person who is proud of what she just achieved with that run - and I'm seeing someone who is finally getting comfortable with her body.  It's taken long enough to get there...

14 comments:

  1. I absolutely LOVE this, and you look so adorable in those pictures! Happy, healthy, active, vibrant, and attractive, and I'm so glad you are coming to see that too!

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  2. Great post, I love it!

    It's funny that I can wear an outfit and feel very good in it and about it. But when (by accident) a photo is made of it and I look at it from a distance: like you I'm the worst critic on myself. That's why I don't like taken photo's of myself and is my FB photo always the same.

    You look good babe.

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  3. Great post today! Thanks for sharing. I love your contentment with yourself right where you are now.

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  4. I absolutely LOVED this post - now we just have to get Helen in on the same mind set! You should be so proud of how far you have come! Love that you did 5.2 miles on your birthday - I may have to steal that next year on my 48th birthday - I've got until next March - ha!

    Hugs!

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  5. That is a great mindset to have! You do have quite the glow about you.

    Funny how I will say that I feel like the Michelin man in my biking clothes LOL GMTA. I figure when I am working out - I dress for comfort and the activity and if someone wants to comment, they can get on a bike and just try to come along with me.

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  6. I think you look lovely! There's a healthy glow in your face most definitely.

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  7. You look fabulous and you are right...happy and at peace!!!!

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  8. You look amazing, you ARE amazing, and you continue to inspire me with your wisdom!!!

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  9. Lovely post, Shelley! And you're a lovely person too. We can be our own worst critics. However, good for you for loving those moments even if the inner critic momentarily comes out!

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  10. We can all say that there are things about us in each picture that we don't like but let us not forget the memory behind the picture itsself. Each picture is obviously about a time that we wanted to remember or about how we were feeling. Let us just rejoice in that. You are a lovely person no matter what!

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  11. I love this thought process so much. Thought about it all day yesterday. I'm not quite as advanced as you, but I'm actively working on it :)

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  12. Great post--we are always our own worst critics! I didn't even see any of these "rolls" you speak of, all I saw was an athletic woman having a great time!

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  13. You are so right - you're glowing and gorgeously happy and healthy in your running picture and that's what is the most important!

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  14. Oh Shelley, I'm so happy for you. That is so wonderful I teared up. I'm not there yet for sure, but every once in a while I find an article of clothing that I think is very flattering. I think you look great in your athletic garb.

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