So I've mentioned a time or three that my weight has climbed a bit since January - stopping running/stress eating made for approximately a 10 pound gain (not exactly sure since I wasn't weighing myself very often - just going by how my clothes fit). And while I'm still not back to running (insert every swear word here over my frustration with this), I have been able to let go of a lot of the stress I was feeling lately (my mom's no chemo news last week was icing on the cake - and yes, I recognize the irony of that idiom, lol).
I went to California with the intent of getting back on track with my eating - I figured it would be pretty easy, since I was very successful with that on my visit last year. Barbara and her family eat a really healthy diet...I would just join in and perhaps lose a few of these extra pounds in the process. Except that it was a time of celebration, and oh, how we (the royal) love to do that with food. Cookies, pies, tarts, See's candies - I confess that I had more days of having treats than not. Dang, they were good. And I enjoyed every bite. But I was reminded of why I try to not get started on the sugar/white flour train, because it seems to trigger a craving that I want to have something sweet every day. And quite frankly, I'd like to be in control of this - I'd like to choose when to have a treat, instead of being hit by a craving and acting on it. But, I was on vacation, and I didn't stress over this - I just knew that I'd have to face the music when I got home. Guess what? I did not gain any weight. I was really shocked when I got on the scale. And I realized that if I could eat that amount of empty, sugary calories and maintain my weight, well, imagine what might happen if I actually tried to cut back a bit?!?
I'm not saying this is easy, any of it. Weight loss, weight maintenance. It takes constant thought and vigilance to make any changes. But I have to say that for me, I can make it happen. It IS within my power (even though it seems to go in super slo-mo) to lose weight. So why don't I work harder at this? For crying out loud, it's not like I have to be all super-strict with my eating, obviously, considering all I ate over the last few weeks and maintained. I'm not exactly frustrated, and overall I'm in a pretty happy place...I just want to take my food choices down a notch (just one - we have too much celebrating and entertaining in the next few weeks and I'm not going to miss out on that...life is too short, you know?)...I'll eat the dessert. But maybe I'll just have one serving this time. See? That wouldn't be too bad, right? And yes, I am talking to myself here.